“I always get asked, ‘Where do you get your confidence?’ I think people are well meaning, but it is pretty insulting. Because, what it means to me is, ‘You, Mindy Kaling, have all the trappings of a very marginalized person. You’re not skinny, you’re not white, you’re a woman. Why on earth would you feel like you are worth anything?”
-Mindy Kaling – interview with Parade
The Size Zero Myth:
#Myth 1- I’m not perfect:
I am not ugly, but I am not perfect too. I will have to reduce few ounces and inches. I should stop eating fatty food and start drinking soups and eating salads. Maybe get few cosmetic surgeries to get the perfect look. I am not confident about myself, once I become totally fit and in-shape, I will be confident. Till then I am just not perfect.
#Myth 2- I will not be able to find a date:
I will not be able to find dates if I don’t change the way I look. Outer appearance attracts men. As I do not have such a great body, my worth is less.
#Myth 3- People will not accept me the way I am:
Because I do not match the norms of what people from the society standardize, I will not be accepted by anyone.
The Wise Hero Reality:
I always used to crib about the fact that I need to diet and workout to make myself look acceptable whereas I see all my girlfriends munching those chicken wings with no sign of guilt. I used to complain always. WHY ME?acceptable whereas I see all my girlfriends munching those chicken wings with no sign of guilt. I used to complain always. WHY ME?
If you are not yet a huge fan of Mindy Kaling, just pick up her glorious book, ‘Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)‘. She writes about being a happy and confident size 8 in Hollywood. This passage from her book is so interesting & humorous, I wanted to share:
“Since I am not model-skinny, but also not super-fat and fabulously owning my hugeness, I fall into that nebulous, “Normal American Woman Size” that legions of fashion stylists detest. For the record, I’m a size 8 (this week, anyway). Many stylists hate that size because, I think, to them, I lack the self-discipline to be an aesthetic, or the sassy, confidence to be a total fatty hedonist. They’re like Pick a lane.”
But on the seriousness of the body image issue, Mindy also writes honestly that she doesn’t pretend to never envy other women. But she also realizes how there are other important things in life to worry about. What Mindy quotes in her book is really relatable.
“If someone called me chubby, it would no longer be something that kept me up late at night. Being called fat is not like being called stupid or unfunny, which is the worst thing you could ever say to me. Do I envy Jennifer Hudson for being able to lose all that weight and look smokin’ hot? Of course, yes. Do I sometimes look at Gisele Bundchen and wonder how awesome life would be if I never had to wear Spanx? Duh, of course. That’s kind of the point of Gisele Bundchen. And maybe I will, once or twice, for a very short period of time. But on the list of things I want to do in my lifetime, that’s not near the top. I mean, it’s not near the bottom either. I’d say it’s right above “Learn to drive a vespa,” but several notches below “film a chase scene for a movie.”
“Though I am a generally happy person who feels comfortable in my skin, I do beat myself up because I am influenced by a societal pressure to be thin. All the time. I feel it when I wake up in the morning and try on every single pair of my jeans and everything looks bad and I just want to go back to sleep. But my secret is: even though I wish I could be thin, and that I could have the ease of lifestyle that I associate with being thin, I don’t wish for it with all of my heart. Because my heart is reserved for way more important things.”
When recently I came across Mindy Kaling’s interview in Vogue, she is referred to as a ‘curvaceous comedienne‘. Mindy opened up how she isn’t all that invested in thinness.
“There’s a whole list of things I would probably change about myself. For example, I’m always trying to lose 15 pounds. But I never need to be skinny. I don’t want to be skinny. I’m constantly in a state of self-improvement . . . but I don’t beat myself up over it.”
Kaling isn’t afraid to take risks, particularly when they involve color or patterns. TV star further says…
“It’s really tempting not to take chances. But I don’t want to be fearful. I don’t want my tombstone to say, ‘She hid her imperfections well on the red carpet.”
There was a lot of talk about the emerald green crop top paired with a matching pencil skirt which the 34-year-old actress took to the stage at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood. The Mindy Project star flashed several inches of her midriff. This is what she said in reply to the huge public interest.
She talks a lot about her body and eating habits which is helping women with self-image issues, eating disorders or obsession with how they look.
She also says ‘She’d rather spend time thinking about the things that are important to her than obsessing over calories and gym routines. She isn’t interested in a life spent without Girl Scout cookies and In-N-Out burgers’
She posted a fan’s illustration of herself on Instagram using the hashtag #thickthighs. Her followers applauded her for what they thought was hilarious and honest.
Kaling explained Jimmy Kimmel the annoying backhanded compliments she receives from fans about how she accepts her shape.
“I’m also the recipient of a lot of backhanded compliments about it, where people are like, ‘It’s so nice that Mindy Kaling doesn’t feel she needs to subscribe to the ideals of beauty that other people do.’ And I’m like, I do subscribe. They’re like, ‘It’s so refreshing that Mindy feels comfortable to let herself go and be a fat sea monster!’ By the way, I run and work out. It takes a lot of effort to look like a normal/chubby woman”
Mindy Kaling was also featured on the cover on Elle Magazine. It was not too long before tweets started coming in regarding how Elle showed full-body pics of Zooey Deschanel, Amy Poehler, and Allison Williams — but a close-up of Mindy. Many people improvised the theory that they were fat-shaming her.
Responding to the tweets Mindy had to say…
I love my @ELLEmagazine cover. It made me feel glamorous & cool. And if anyone wants to see more of my body, go on thirteen dates with me.
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 7, 2014
Mindy Kaling shared her body image advice to young girls in a Teen Vogue profile:
“I get so worried about girls with body image stuff… And I feel like I have been able to have a fun career and be an on-camera talent and be someone who has boyfriends and love interests and wears nice clothes and those kinds of things without having to be an emaciated stick. And it is possible to do it. In life, you don’t have to be that way and you can have a great life, a fun life, and a fulfilling love life.”
Mindy is often referred to as a body-positive celeb but she admits she doesn’t fully identify with this label. She too has a “complicated relationship” with her body, though she doesn’t see the point in depriving herself to lose weight. During an especially raw and sincere moment, Kaling, a self-identified size 10, says…
“My deep dark secret is that I absolutely do try to conform to normal standards of beauty. I am just not remotely successful at it.”
Mindy is no doubt an extremely talented woman who is not skinny but still looks gorgeous not only by her looks but her wit and humor. She has written two books and also writes & stars in her own show ‘The Mindy Project‘ as Dr. Mindy Lahiri. The show portrays Mindy who is a chubby confident doctor, who does not find herself less hot than others. I was impressed by her and encouraged to love myself the way I am.
I myself have bought these books and loved reading them. I highly recommend you to buy these too.
Coming from someone who is not fat, but not skinny (like my faux twin Mindy Kaling), here are certain relatable one-liners from the show that will boost up your confidence and make you feel worthy again.
1. Yes, I’m not Skinny but I can certainly pull off Pole dance and look Sexy…
2. I love Ice-cream and Chicken wings and I will eat it my way. It is called democracy. I don’t count calories.
3. I may not be perfect at Zumba. At least I try. So the joke is on you.
4. That is exactly who I am..
5. Yes, I own it…
6. I have a nice body and I am not shy to show it off..
7. The Art of Seduction. Yes, I master in it…
8. I look slutty and sexy in Cat woman suit…
9. I look sexy posing on the piano while my BF plays & when I sing ‘Santa Baby’ at a Christmas party…
10. When I am the coolest person I know…
11. I am not less than any celebrity or actress…
I can pull of any cloths they wear…
I resemble a lot of them…
I am as famous as any other actress and Cosmo features me…
WikiLeaks treats me like a celebrity…
12. I do not define myself by the standards others have set. I am normal in my own way…
13. How I deal with weight comments…
14. It is my body, so leave me alone…
15. When someone calls me chubby at my own party…
16. No matter what others think, I am my own model…
17. This is how I channel my inner Beyoncé…
18. When someone calls me a mess…
19. I have a hot butt and I do get attention from every guy, just like any other hot girl…
20. Confidence is the key…
21. I have a hot body and I am good in bed..
22. I don’t let others choose me, I choose them and I have standards…
What we learn from Kaling is, you are not going to love your body all the time, and that’s totally OK. You can either care too much about outer appearance and obsess over it or completely let go of yourself and not care at all. But there is always a third way which is to take care of your body and not make a big deal out of it.
Who doesn’t mind losing a little weight and look good, but do not base your self-worth on it. Your inner-beauty does not need make-up.
Get all the four seasons of The Mindy Project here….
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Meet The Wise Hero
“Just a free bird from the flock”
From the Holy-Land of India rises a spirit with self-gained wisdom and the passion to share it with you. These wise scripts once read will free your mind of negative energy and bring in all facts to your never-ending internal Encyclopedia - your Brain! Enjoy the journey of facts and real life experiences and do share your story with us.
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